Friends — I am delighted to introduce yet another amazing guru today. Ellen Day Crady is an expert at teaching people to live intentionally through choice. One of her talents is closet curation and today on the blog she teaches you how to dress for the way you want feel. Now if you cleaned your closet with us back in April, take note, your clothes are speaking to you and Ellen is going to tell you how to listen and how this can change your behaviors to impact your intention. And isn’t a little intention what we all need? I guarantee you are going to have fun with this one. Enjoy. XOXO, Elaine
Ah, fall. You can feel it coming, can’t you? New routines, new fashion lines, new flavors, new colors. With the return of fall, school and more regular schedules that demand more time and energy, it is imperative to get back into the flow and practice of healthy habits that allow you to take time to connect to yourself in the midst of all the hustle and bustle.
How would it feel to start your day gently, by connecting to yourself in the most powerful way you can – by choosing how you want to feel? Imagine deciding in advance that you want to feel soft, strong, edgy, fit, vivacious, brave, abundant, expressive, seen, secure, luminous, accomplished, stylish, bad-ass? What would life look like if you decided that at the beginning of your day? What would YOU look like if you decided that in the morning? What would you wear? What would you do? How would you act as you moved through your day with that feeling at the forefront of your mind? Maybe a bit differently than usual, yes? A bit differently than just pulling on whatever was first in your closet or the standby workout wear to get you through your errands?
You see, your feelings shape your behaviors, and your behaviors shape your day. The great thing about behaviors is that you are in complete control. You get to choose! You get to choose the feelings you want to feel to shape your days, and ultimately, your life. As the brilliant Danielle Laporte says, “Knowing how you actually want to feel is the most potent form of clarity that you can have.” And life is full of choices and opportunities to feel exactly the way you want.
It may feel like a big undertaking to think and decide how you want to feel, especially since this is not something we discuss much in our culture. So to take that down to a micro level and make it bite-sized and relevant as an easy, everyday step, I like to ask, “What can you do right now to start you feeling the way you want to feel for today? What is your ‘now’ step?” Luckily, there are three, and they are all easy to do. And you can start them while you are still in bed!
Here are three things to do in the morning before you even get up that will help you live a day that is aligned to the feeling you most desire:
FOCUS ON ONE THING FOR WHICH YOU ARE GRATEFUL – When you first wake up, as your first thoughts start to move, pause the train that usually hijacks your brain waves and instead of instantly thinking about tasks coming up for the day or the things you are worried about, slow down for a minute and FOCUS INSTEAD ON ONE THING FOR WHICH YOU ARE GRATEFUL. Just one thing. Even if it is only, “I am so grateful for these cool sheets surrounding my body.” Let that thought swirl around your brain and really feel it. Move your legs around and revel in the deliciousness of the coolness of those sheets, steep in the gratitude you feel for that comfort. Let those thoughts make friends with other thoughts about things for which you are grateful and relish the predominant feeling of gratitude. What an incredible way to start your thought patterns for the day!
ASK YOURSELF, “HOW DO I WANT TO FEEL TODAY?” – As you start to make the shift in your thoughts from the things for which you are grateful to the tasks and activities that are a part of the upcoming day, just asking this question puts you light years ahead in terms of connection with yourself. You know you have a meeting this afternoon, in addition to everything else that you have going on, but this meeting is important, and you will be leading it. When you ask yourself, “How do I want to feel today?” the reply might be: powerful, in control, fully feminine, a bit intimidating. (Remember as you decide how you want to feel not to judge the feeling. There are no wrong answers.)
You will notice as you get into this practice of identifying your intentional feelings for the day that you will start to get messages from your wardrobe. When you decide you want to feel powerful, in control, fully feminine, a bit intimidating, you will begin to automatically get pictures in your mind of the pieces you have in your wardrobe that make you feel that way. Because, just as our feelings are vibrational energy that are here to serve us, our possessions are as well. Like most things, though, they need direction, and when you identify what it is that you want, you give your clothes a green light to start answering the requests you have for them, which includes the right pieces “volunteering” for the job of serving you for the day ahead. Each piece that you own has a different purpose, and thus a different vibration.
You may have already experienced this. You already know which pieces in your wardrobe make you feel elegant, sexy, daring, vibrant, soft. You have felt the difference between wearing your “date night” outfit and your comfy clothes. See? Different clothes, different vibrations, different purpose. The only thing you will be doing differently moving forward is identifying the feelings you wish to feel at the beginning of the day.
DRESS FOR THAT FEELING! – You have asked the question, “How do I want to feel today?” and you have the answer. Now, you get to DRESS FOR THAT FEELING! What pops into your head almost immediately are the images of a blazer, a pencil skirt, those leopard pump stilettos you love, and a red lip. Here is where I want to give you permission to trust yourself. Know that all the answers you get back when you ask this question are right for you for today! Your only job at this point is to follow the guidance that is given to you.
Dressing for the feeling will do two things for you:
- It will immediately put you in that specific vibrational framework with that choice (meaning you will BE powerful, in control, fully feminine, and a bit intimidating).
- It will continue that vibration throughout the day so that the choices you make will further support you in what you want to feel by choosing behaviors you at your most “powerful” would do, or you at your most “in control” would do, or you as “fully feminine” would do. You might leave the house a bit early and treat yourself to a mocha latte with a dash of cinnamon in it, or remember to choose a mid-morning super-food snack, or maybe call the contractor yourself and tell him exactly what YOU think about him pushing the deadline and going over budget, or take a minute longer in the mirror to love the way you feel in this outfit and admire your curves, your beauty, because damn, you really are an amazingly stunning woman, and you feel it. This meeting? Hell, you could rule the world in this outfit!
You see? Your feelings influence your choices, your choices result in your behaviors, your behaviors create momentum in any direction and momentum is what carries your life through the time that passes. So intentionally choosing the feelings that you want = the life that you want!
Your feelings are powerful energy that are directly connected to your intuition, your own inner knowing. Their purpose is to guide you in your daily life. They want to be paid attention to, acknowledged, felt, seen, and heard. Those feelings are the greatest gift we have to know the truth of our lives, and more importantly, where we want to go from here. So asking yourself every morning what you would like to choose to feel sets the tone for the entire day, and you will start to really feel the joy of living intentionally what you want. It all starts with a choice! And we each have it to make, every single morning.
Ellen Day Crady is an expert at teaching people how to live intentionally through choice. She has the divine gift of clarity and loves being able to guide people towards clear answers and action. She creates emotional and physical space in people’s lives through public speaking, leading workshops in the arts of Desire Mapping and in her clients’ wardrobes with a process that she calls “Closet Curation.” Ellen believes that our immediate space is limited, and therefore sacred, and that not everything deserves a place of honor in our immediate surroundings. And, that the most empowering and joyful part of living life is getting to choose.
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